Not Default Settings

I can’t remember where I came across the notion of ‘default settings.’ Almost certainly in a middle-of-the-night TikTok/FB video rabbit hole. But I love it. It carries the meaning of what is often called ‘normal’ but without the weight of othering implied to those whose needs or identities fall outside of what is considered normal.

The term also acknowledges the social context and constructs that define those norms. For example, the default setting in human beings is to be heterosexual and cisgender. But, to quote the American poet and satirist Dorothy Parker: "Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common."

I am not set to default settings in many ways, in terms of gender, sexuality, and neurotype, for example. Much of my energy in life has been focused on conforming to the expectations of the default settings. I have been moderately successful in doing so, however, it left me exhausted and feeling like I was not fulfilling my potential. As I worked through this I realised that there was a great deal of theological reflection embedded in this working out. A lot of the reflections in this blog stem from that realisation. If the creation reflects the glorious diversity of the Divine, surely my own diversity, and that of all humanity is a gift to encountering God not the stumbling block it has become.